*bad day*

I think today was my bad day ever =(
Planned to go out earlier but out on 3pm,
It's really not a good timing~
I worried the car at the back hit me,
so I hit the car in front of mine.
After hit, my mind was blank ..
I forgot take the plat number of that car,
I forgot take photos,
What I learned before,
I totally forgot.
I wanna cried that moment,
but I told myself,
Nobody will help me even I cried out loud.
Suddenly felt tired of this life.
I just hope to get a happy life
that's all...
I had it before,
Why god take away from me?
Am i not deserve to have it?
I'm tired.
Remember,
When you need somebody,
nobody will be here for you.

My car accompany for 3 years,
now he has to go surgery,
How can i survive without him this few weeks??

*结束吧*

每次常听人说，
女人心，海底针；
我说是：
男人心，海底针才对。
是你放弃了，
我也没必要坚持了。。
一个人是不能维持一段感情的。
既然你那么坚决，
我也没必要纠缠了，
我也给自己最长的极限了，
你不想理，
我又何必做那么多呢。。
从前总是辛辛苦苦的要得到，
当得到后却要放弃，
这就是男人的海底针吧。。

I respect those that tell me the truth,
no matter how hard it is.
But if you are not,
you are a coward.

*心，烂透了*

半夜醒来不是件好事~
最近总是爱胡思乱想~
你的举动告诉了我，
不要再做无谓的动作了~
不要再纠缠了~


No one ever get tired of loving.
But everyone gets tired of 
waiting,
assuming,
hearing lies 
and 
saying sorry...

*bad day*

What a bad day for me =(
Stomach starting to play with me now,
gastric, pain, gastric pain...
What my stomach want actually?
After eat still gastric,
After gastric pain again..
I need you badly, sweet medicine.
Where can buy it?
Who will create sweet medicine for me??
Totally down today ....
thanks god i'm still alive~!
I don't deserve to have this kind of treating please!!

*im sorry*

I'm sorry for everything
I'm sorry that I hurt you 
I'm sorry that I make you trouble
I don't want back everything
I want you to be happy
I hope you understand it ..
I already tried my best make us to be more better, 
But you are the one destroyed it. 
I'm hurt
I'm sad
But you still leave me like that 
I have to accept the fact

.

*happy birthday --> big head*

生日快乐，大头~

今天一早就下关丹，

本来目的是去找新的巴士站，

哪知道忘了 >.<

我们先去巴刹吃东西~

再去看戏 SDU

一部笑戏来的~

然后去唱歌。

晚餐我们吃韩国餐，

食物都不错的~

 这个马来人提早开斋

Only available in Malaysia~!

*sunday in kmn*

Sunday is not a weekend in kemaman =)
I'm not going anywhere unless play ball in the evening~
I had my favorite dishes tonight --> Asam chicken =D
After dinner, I went to visit my friend's son 
He is getting bigger and handsome,
I wish I got the chance to talk with him soon..
Girl's talks start after visitation.
My girls include Jia Wei and Hui Xin
I thought we don't have this chance to gather again 
since Hui Xin becomes mummy
and Jia Wei always play badminton~
I had lost contact to them over the past year..
Guys, if you think friends are important than your beloved,
do remember she will give up her friends because of you,
love her while she is still yours 
Girls, if you think guy is everything for you,
do re-correct your mind set.
You will get much more painful 
when he choose to leave you.
Guys, be smart 
Girls, be tough 

I love him <3 p="">

*幸福就是*

不想再牵手，就该放开手
让爱学会成全和自由
如果还能够继续往前走，
挽留并不代表谁懦弱
我们曾心动，也都曾心痛
失去太多才懂得拥有
如果没有过 每一次冲动
怎能相遇过程的感动
我们往往努力爱却更寂寞
一起做过的梦到了最后真的只是梦
我们常常为了谁受尽折磨
不明白幸福到底是什么
幸福就是该结束的时候不再强求
在你应该珍惜的时候学会别无所求
幸福就是去包容 却从不会遗忘自我
懂得爱自己才更加辽阔
曾为谁执着 也为谁失落
为谁华丽生话的罗阔
爱没有对错 错过才解脱
泪水终究能洗尽承诺

幸福就是被爱过 被伤过都有收获
在你还能珍惜的时候珍惜你的选择
幸福是让爱能海阔天空

*end*

写了一大遍的，

“Backspace" 就变空了。

现在的心就像空了。。

累了。。。

既然不爱了，

结束吧。。。

终于要放下了。。

*bye my friend*

Goodbye my friend, Tan Choon Siong

He has to go back to US 

My brother with me bring him to sunway pyramid hair cut

(His gay lou hairstylist there)

We went to play bowling while he went to hair cut

My brother was suck at the first game

only earn 65 points but i get 82 points =)

(proud of myself) =p

He become insane in the second game

OMG strike strike strike

115 points for him while i lose and only get 92 points =(

He really good in playing bowling la

Friend, you have to back on next year ya!!

We will miss you !

*累*

Why people have to so tired?
I'm tired of everything..
I have tried to give up at the moment when I can't survive at this tired world..
Am I the person should get all this unfair stuff?
I also just a human being that not famous, not the pretty, not the best in this world..
I just want same with other girls...
Hope there will be a miracle for me soon..
How tired in my life,
I smile and laugh the louder one in front of them..
I'm tiring of this ...
I want choose my life, I don't want my life choose me anymore! :'(

我不喜欢花，
不是因为它们不漂亮，
是因为自己都不会照顾自己，
又怎样照顾它们。。。
可怜的花，
落在我手中，
就是注定被丢进垃圾桶了。。

*Boring day*

今天很闷，没上课，没工作，没事做，又是颓废的一天~
很想做的却做不到，不想做的就自然不想做了~ =p
真的不喜欢无所事事的~
刚还了四百多块的电话费，想去逛街买东西都没心情了~
昨晚九点就睡了，今早九点就醒了.
一直到现在还是那么精神，怎样过这一天啊？！
无聊的最高境界就是：开着电脑，按着手机，望着电视。
而我就是在做这些事~ >.<
有些人脸上有太多的笑容，是因为他们心中有太多的泪水。
我希望自己依旧是个永远长不大的小孩。
没有破碎的心，没有痛苦的眼泪。。

我的早餐

*Big girl don't cry*

When a girl cries,

it's not over one thing.

It's a build up of anger and tears they have been holding for so long.

They try to put on a smile everyday so no one will see the pain they're really feeling.

And sometimes,

the happiest girls are the one breaking down inside.

*outing*

Last friday went to pavillion with brother =)

Before to pavillion watch movie,

we went to times square played bowling with my colleagues.

First time hang out with them.

Laughed from the beginning until the end, so tired~

After bowling, went to movie "white house down"

It was a nice movie..

I fall asleep at the beginning, 

when the peak of the movie, is time for me to watch it =)

Enjoyable with him.. <3 font="">

 He gave me rm20 for petrol fees =p

 He don't know i took it =)

He shame to take at outside ~

*Alone*

I don't like to be alone.
I think lot when I''m alone.
I'm listening to the music, repeat and repeat.
I'm tired but I struggled on.
I'm sad but I don't want let you know.
I miss you but i stopped showing.
I still care but you don't bother it.
Tears are the words my heart uses to explain
whenever my smiles can't cover up my pain.
Seems like you not appreciate what I did.
I won't do it again since I'm always the crazy one.
A picture's worth a thousand words.
A song is worth a million.
But the tears falling from eyes are worth a billion.

STOP PRETENDING EVERYTHING INCLUDE YOUR SMILES WITH A DEEP HURT

*Him*

他是我最好的开心果~

我伤心时，

虽然不是很会安慰我，

至少他肯听我诉苦~

我开心时，

他也陪我笑~

他是永远和我脱不离关系的~

他知道我一个人，

过来这里陪我~

可是他要回去了，

他不理我了~

真的很Sad下~~~~~

*life*

Feel wanna back kemaman this week,
but have to work~ 
My twins friend gonna leave to NZ and America soon~
Today had a funny class with classmate~
Sir was punish who didn't complete his homework~
His class always that funny =)
Tomorrow no class!
What I'm gonna do~
Zzz..
Great that my eyes getting pretty and pretty :D

*Working*

Continue my work after 7 months break ~ =p
Really a long break~
Not the first time attend meeting,
but lot supervisors thought i'm new,
Worry I will cry or what after the terrible meeting~
I'm not first time see my boss angry and scold people..
Long time didn't work,
do lot mistake~
This job is good cause they give me chance to change =)

Holds her hand in public, it's like saying you are proud to have her <3 font="">
Nice quote =D

*打麻将*

终于搬来新家啦~
不错的一个家啦~
当天晚上和嘉荣，弟弟打麻将，
弟弟在一盘赢了，
他还算算算说：
收你们三块就好啦~ @.@
结果我和嘉荣算算，
只是rm2.90!
他连rm0.10 都要骗我们~
笑到肚子痛~
和他们真的很开心 =D

*I'm a failure*

When I'm single,
I envy who got boyfriend;
When I'm in relationship,
I proud for myself;
When I'm single,
I felt myself fail..
I choose the life,
I have to accept it..
I had try my best fight it back,
It still failed..
I'm a failure ~

*Damn*

Damn hate the feeling ..!.
Not I don't want appreciate this relationship ok?!
Why you'll keep asking me same question?
Even family gives me lot pressure!
I just hope you all support me!
I knew this will happen soon,
just I haven't back kmn, 
can ask same things through phone already.
If i back there, they wanna force me until i can't breath at all?!
Damn it!!
When i with him,
they are the one who not agree,
Now they got chance to bebel me lo!
Fucking hate!!!!
Bullshit to the fellow who said something like that !!
Think before you said !

*人生*

有些事还是要面对，

既然他舍得丢那么多问题给我；

即使我不懂怎么解决，

也要面对！

人总是不完美，

只是我那么不好运，

会遇到两次。。

失败了，

偷笑的人后面多得是，

与你分享的人却少之又少。。

即使痛得多难受还是要微笑，

这次的痛，

不是一般的跌倒就能轻易的爬起来~

Whenever someone says 'Don't cry'

I always cry harder.

*Thanks gor & Jie*

Woke up early in the morning,
Saw this on my table,
thanks to them take care me~
When they asked me about him,
I just can pretending...
So sorry I'm lying~
Love this small Milo already~
Yiak, my eyes still that ugllllllyyyyy..!!

When i text you, it means i miss you;
When i don't text you, it means i'm waiting for you to miss me,
but i know you won't...
until you choose to end of all this..

*Broken Heart*

I don't deserve all of this, 
I can't choose anything since everything is out of my control.
I just can accept it with my unwilling heart.
I hate this feeling coming back to me again!

Don't play with someone's heart
if you have no intentions of a serious relationship.

*Tired*

Should i go back this week?
How i want to face with my parent?
Should i pretending I'm nothing in front my friends?
I'm tiring of pretending happy already.
My stomach keep annoying me but it don't want any food,
My head keep paining but it don't want any medicine,
My heart keep tearing but it don't know what should do..
Who will the next person who hurt me again?
I don't like to be alone here!!

I hate that i miss you,
I hate that you forgot about me,
I hate that you don't want me,
and I hate that i still care about you....

*reality*

Feel like only here i can make myself not so sad..
I know everything can't change,
I know this is the truth,
I know we can't live at the past,
but everyone also know say,
who really did it easily?
I really need a big hug~!
What is love?
What is responsibility to love?
Am i not worth to be love? ='(

Don't come into my life unless you want STAY!

*Feeling*

Had a dream about you last night,
After woke up only realize that only a dream..
My friend told me don't dream about it.
Can a person control her dream?
Can a person forget her beloved easily?
Do you really put down everything easily?
All the memories keep playing around in my mind..
You are the one who cheer me up,
You are the one who hurt me deeply.
You are the one who did everything on me.
I not stronger like everyone thought..
include you..........
If a girl leans towards you, kiss her.
If a girl's hand is free, hold it. 
And if she's upset, hug her till she's okay

爱一个人很容易，
放下一个人很难。。

*suffer life*

I still suffer right now.!!

Really hurting when thinking back..!

How become amnesia about our relationship?!

This is the decision you think we will better?

I felt more suffer than before!

What i did wrong is put too much effort between our relationship?

or too care you make you felt annoying?

or never think about your situation?

 you think let me freedom can get a guy who take care me well?

or you felt hurting now better than hurting after few years?

But do you think about me before make this decision?!

Really suffer right now !!

why guy always the selfish human in this world?!!

What i did so i should get this punishment?!

ARRRRHHH!!!!!!!!

当一切来的太突然时，

你唯有能做的就是接受。。

*Sing a song*

I control myself not to cry in front of them,

 I have to be strong, 

not bring sadness for them.

When i'm with him, 

i can sing a sad song with my happiness..

I almost cried out when i sing just now,

and i can felt the feeling of the lyrics.

Who can put down a relationship easily?

Everyone had hurt and grow up day by day.

Just because I'm strong enough to handle pain,

 doesn't mean that i deserve it.

*Sushi Zanmai*

Thanks ying for accompany to Sushi Zanmai today.. =') Zanmai is one of the place me and him will go always. One hot and one cold ocha ordered by him, will mix it to a suitable temperature ocha for me, felt warm suddenly. Chawanmushi was our favorite there and he will ordered salmon for me cause he knows that is my favorite~ Everything had become memories~
Huh, don't like my ugly eyes right now~ so tears pleaaaase stop hurting heart or eye..!!

Sitting on your bed, thinking of one person and remembering all those memories and then realise that they might never happen again.

Memories

See this photo, my heart trying to make my tears coming out.... He brought me to anywhere i want to go, he brought me lots of memories, he brought lots happiness in my life and now all becomes my sadness. . Really suffer at this moment.. not cause he leave me but i not appreciate him nicely and truly, that's why this is our ending. my punishment is coming..

妈，可惜又能怎样，看开点吧。。

The only reasons why people hold on to memories is because memories are the only thing that don't change when everything else does. 

*Whatever*

The more i told myself: doesn't matter, doesn't matter, the faster the tears will come out itself =') 

Here only the way i can writing down my feeling, just want to feel more comfortable.. 

I know lots of friends care me when i'm sad, I'm sorry to them that make them worry so much..

So i just can tell them: I'm okay =)

From the past until now, i have been a counselor of love to many peoples,at least my advice for them look open a bit.. When come into my problem, how i advice myself easily? =P Really poor to this problem ..

Very bad condition now, get cold, coughing and pain come sekali gus ~ hope will recover soon..

Quote of my day

I learned to GIVE not because i have much,
but because i know exactly how it feels to have NOTHING.

28/6/2013

Welcome back to my blogspot life :D I was too busy with my relationship before and now, i got time to update my everything here..Broke up is not good for sure, but with a reasonable reason, i should respect him =) Since he has his right to choose whatever he want and i got my right to choose my life even i still not willing to put down everything..... I believe time can prove everything .. =DNow we should fight for our life, stay good Suddenly like the word :  是你的就是你的，不是你的怎样勉强都不是你的。

Happy birthday to me!! :)

Thank you everyone celebrate my 22nd birthday for me especially my boyfriend and 91 gengzz :))

I love you all !! :D
I had received the most valuable present from my boyfriend --> iPad
And cake from 91 geng ..
Although just few people, thats already enough for me .. =]
And those who wish me on Facebook, thanks everyone !! :)
And ...... Video from Ying Ying .. Really thanks and appreciate it . =))

2013

Welcome to my blog~!
Welcome 2013 :)
Welcome human being~
I'm studying smart for my next week exam now~
I just aim to pass now, but pass like still far away from me~
Last year, i really play a lot~
but what to regret now ~
so i just can study smart, but not study hard :P
Hope i can passssssssssssssssssss~ =)
Good luck !!